I was having so much fun watching the counter on the blog build and build and build, and then one day it just disappeared from the blog. The title for it was there, and there was an empty box, but no matter what I did, it wouldn't display the counter any more.
*sigh*
This makes me very sad because I was really excited for when it finally reached 10,000. But all you wonderful people reading my blog are making the new, lovely counter move really, really fast! (Either that, or I'm visiting it way too much each day.)
Thanks! And please keep reading.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Shhhh....
Whew! What a relief. Now, let's see if we can get through the next couple of weeks of parties with work, friends, and family.
Ho ho ho!
A very hard thing to blog about
A friend recently blogged about the dangers of being too passionate about what is happening in the lives of her friends. Her Mr. Wonderful suggested being passive with a situation involving a friend's seemingly bad choices.
This is my reply to her blog:
I don't know if there's a good answer to the passive vs. passionate question. We are who we are, but we also need to allow other people to make their own choices without it taking over us completely. I see this over and over with Mr. Perfect's kids. The two oldest have decided to choose their mom over their dad. They will contact him when they want something (usually money) but don't want him in their lives otherwise. It's been especially hard with his second daughter because they were so close, and she used to defend him when her older sister attacked. He can't remove himself from his kids' lives. We both know that's not an option. But I have a really hard time watching him being used by them and then ignored or openly mistreated.
Because the oldest has always chosen her mom's side, he's been dealing with this for years, but it's fresh for me. He will be there for them when they need it, but he also tells me that I don't have to. If a request comes to me for something, I now have the right to say no. In fact, he told me the next time the younger daughter asks for something, I shouldn't even consider it. I should just say "Hmm...considering how you treat me and your dad, why do you think I should do this for you?" This is a new concept for me. I love these kids and want what's best, but supporting them in things I find harmful or wrong or enabling their treatment of their dad isn't the best for anyone. It is okay to be passive, to look at your friend and say "I can't help you or support what you're doing right now." And it is okay, at times, to consider your own mental and emotional health, otherwise there won't be enough of you to help the next time.
So, does anyone else have some advice for either my friend or me with these kinds of situations? All suggestions will be gladly accepted and considered.
This is my reply to her blog:
I don't know if there's a good answer to the passive vs. passionate question. We are who we are, but we also need to allow other people to make their own choices without it taking over us completely. I see this over and over with Mr. Perfect's kids. The two oldest have decided to choose their mom over their dad. They will contact him when they want something (usually money) but don't want him in their lives otherwise. It's been especially hard with his second daughter because they were so close, and she used to defend him when her older sister attacked. He can't remove himself from his kids' lives. We both know that's not an option. But I have a really hard time watching him being used by them and then ignored or openly mistreated.
Because the oldest has always chosen her mom's side, he's been dealing with this for years, but it's fresh for me. He will be there for them when they need it, but he also tells me that I don't have to. If a request comes to me for something, I now have the right to say no. In fact, he told me the next time the younger daughter asks for something, I shouldn't even consider it. I should just say "Hmm...considering how you treat me and your dad, why do you think I should do this for you?" This is a new concept for me. I love these kids and want what's best, but supporting them in things I find harmful or wrong or enabling their treatment of their dad isn't the best for anyone. It is okay to be passive, to look at your friend and say "I can't help you or support what you're doing right now." And it is okay, at times, to consider your own mental and emotional health, otherwise there won't be enough of you to help the next time.
So, does anyone else have some advice for either my friend or me with these kinds of situations? All suggestions will be gladly accepted and considered.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Happy Birthday, Mr. Perfect!
Everyone sing along! [cue music]This month is such a special one,
It's birthday time for you.
We'd really like to celebrate this happy day with you!
Okay, so we are going to celebrate with him. Last night it was dinner with Game Boy, including in-bone ham, funeral potatoes, and homemade carrot cake (complete with homemade cream cheese frosting). Tonight, it's Game Boy's band concert and then on to The Forgotten Carols. We are very excited about both. Most Happy Girl is happy to be a cougar no longer. Now, they are the same age (at least for the next 6-1/2 months). However, no matter how many birthday's Mr. Perfect has, she will always be older. *sigh*
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