When you are reactionary, you are allowing someone else to control you. It's better to be proactive. To take the initiative. To do what you believe and feel is best. To tell the truth. To be calm and collected.
Of course, you have to do this with filters on. Doing any of this without filters on is social suicide. You'll spend the rest of your live wondering why people don't want to talk to you.
3 comments:
Filters? What are filters? ;)
Do you mean specifically situations when you have to break some bad news or unpopular opinion to someone? Being proactive, taking the initiative and doing what I felt was best landed me in hot water before. Could you elaborate what filters are? Do you mean, like, sugar-coat the nasty things you have to tell?
Filters mean that you take the time to evaluate whether or not what you want to say or do is really necessary. This may take a moment or a few days or even longer. Sometimes holding your tongue or not taking an action is more appropriate. Only you can determine that, but it does require you to think before speaking or acting.
You also need to know that not everyone is going to like what you say or do, even when you've done your evaluation and know that, for you, it is best to say or do it.
Along with this, we also must relinquish the desire to control how someone else acts based on what we say or do. We shouldn't want to control them anymore than we want them controlling us.
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